If making a movie is tantamount to giving birth then a movie premiere can be akin to showing off your newborn at a family reunion. At both events, you are among people who connect with you on a personal level. These people will usually see your newest creation as something to be adored, if not appreciated. Everyone is joyful. You are happy. Now if we can extend the movie production/baby-making comparison further, we might say that submitting your movie into an actual competition can be compared favorably with entering your child into preschool or kindergarten. The event is filled with some trepidation as it is the precise moment you unleash your creation to the cannibals. You tell yourself that it had to be done, but you know full well that something will be gone forever. On rare occasions, if disciplined, you can still look back with nostalgia at how brave and pure your original pursuit once was and how at one moment during that transcendental time when day begins to creep into night, when you in your glorious solitude, half-naked, sleep-deprived and high on adrenaline had held in between your hands for what seemed like a lifetime something undeniably, absolutely perfect. But after this moment, that perfection will disappear and once again become a myth. But what of love, you ask? Yes, there will always be love. The love still remains for your creation, but it will be of the ordinary, unconditional type.
Disclaimer: I have never had a child, but I do intend to have one.
For me, it’s all about the feel of that blue ribbon on my cheeks. So with all that being said, I want to share with you the results of entering my last two movies, Warm Clothes and The Golden Mother, into the 4-H Short Film Contest at the Fairfax 4-H Fair, which took place this past August 2011. Before we proceed, a bit of background on the 4-H Fair. The fair is a place where 4-H kids are allowed to show off their wonderful creations (artwork, photography, sewing), talents (barrel jumping with horses, gardening, floriculture, tractor pulling, dog agility), and animals (dogs, rabbits, cows, goats, pigs, and things made from dead animals). It really is a wonderful atmosphere that allows children and teenagers to show off their amazing potential or rather how amazing they are right now and how lackluster and unproductive you were at their age. All of their creations, talents, and animals are also judged and awarded ribbons. So what was I doing entering my movies into a 4-H Fair for kids? Well, I did enter my movies into the “Open” category designated for adults who want to try and muscle in on the excitement. Also, my wife is the 4-H Extension Agent for Fairfax County and she asked that I enter my movies. You see, she kind of organizes the whole thing. And this was the first year the movie competition took place at the fair and so there were not a lot of entries. And, who am I kidding? I wanted that damned blue 4-H ribbon. Because blue equals First Place. And First Place equals winner.
4-H Judges’ comments and scores on “Warm Clothes”:
Judge No. 1 –
“Believable characters”
“Very interesting – connecting scientific study to real world”
“Dragged a little”
“Wonderful variety of shots and angles”
“The section where the zebra dryer was created seemed a bit long”
“The accompanying music selections were very nice – added to the tone of the piece”
“After watching this movie I wanted to ‘scrow up’ – a combination of scream and throw up’” (okay, I made this one up)
Final score: 52/60
Judge No. 2 –
“He should have defined the “warmth” part a little clearer- why they were putting on warm clothes – its effect on their lives”
“Random people and the violinist should have played for us to hear.”
“Authentic”
“I didn’t know that the dryer was actually working or if they were just sticking their clothes in there.”
“Definitely original”
“The Zebra Dryer making was too long”
“dragged a little parts were confusing”
“Movie lacked someone who can command your attention like that guy John Stossel does to me when he turns to the camera during one of his investigative reports on that 20/20 show and he starts to furrow his brows and flare his nostrils and I think the behind the scenes people might start dimming the lighting because I notice his complexion changes and gets all serious like and you can tell he’s fed up with something and he starts to say things, powerful things, only I don’t remember what, all I know is that I get lost in the way his mustache moves up and down and up and down and – this movie didn’t have that and it was sorely missed by this judge.”
Final score: 50/60
Final award: Blue Ribbon – First Place Winner
For Judge No. 2, Warm Clothes lacked John Stossel.
Judges’ comments and scores on “The Golden Mother”:
Judge No. 1 –
“Fascinating topic and talent”
“Nice choices in complimentary clips”
“Loved this film!” (I did not add the exclamation point)
“Interesting framing, panning, etc. Very professional feel”
“Great use of the ‘classic’ clips with interviews”
“The piece was a good length – kept my attention the whole time
Final score: 53/60
Judge No. 2 – “Unique”
Final score: 50/60
Final award: Blue Ribbon – First Place Winner
(Editor’s note: The judge’s comment about John Stossel was made up)
My story, Los Poncheros, went from feature script to TV pilot to graphic novel
